stingy d's: guide to a messed up muck

you know when you go to a bar, or a show, or some type of place where the girl's are doing their thing.  and the dude's are some slobbery nitwits.  and you look at a broad. and you flash a few ideas in your head.  and then you notice the broad has some type of boyfriend.  you know how when that happens, right?


what you might would do?

  • you might would stop looking.
  • you might would keep looking, but steer clear.
  • you might would continue looking while asking the girl some type of smart shit.
  • you might would look at the dude (pause) and figure out what's so good about him (no homo)
let's suppose you might did the easy routes.  so you might did stop looking.  no doubt.  so what happened that night?  oh, nothing.  right, cool.  coooool.

dig it, so you might had stayed looking and busted all these funky little scenarios for you two to share a milk shake, and have some hard fuckin shit.  that's that shit!  right, you put her all types of ways, and she loved it!  every minute of it.  dirty girl!  she fucking loved getting fucked!  no doubt.  so what happened that night?  oh you saw a pretty girl.  right, cool.  ok there.

ok and let's suppose you might had would did the presumptuously homo-erotic scenario.  with you looking at the dude.  right, and wondering what's so special about him, that he get's the pretty girl with no effort.  and he just get's everything all the time for free.  and what?  is his body better than mine?  do you wonder if does he have a big dink?  you do?  dag.  

great, fuck that.  what you should be doing, is going up to the girl with something intelligent to say.  go up to her and smile, and tell her that you love her.  for real, that's the line of command.  serious.  straighten up, make sure you appear neat, you smell good, you have a positive outlook, a fantastic feel if you will.  and approach the young lady with cause.  don't rush your words.  breathe evenly.  it is imperative to be clear and make sure she doesn't miss a word, because third time is not the charming.  tell that bitch, "hello, my name is whatever your dumb shit is, and i am in love with you."  speak with solemnity and conviction.  a man of your word.  full of passion and vigor.  a soldier of fortune.  it's like winning two in a row.

anyway, so you did that shit, cus you listened to me.  now her man comes up to you with his two punk ass friends sort of behind him.  smile to him.  and when he starts talking - stick your face out and close to him.  like you couldn't hear him under any type of circumstance that exist on planet earth.  he will get upset, that's good.  leap through that punk, and knock his tougher friend dead in the nose.  create enough space to turn around and rock the main dude square in the mug.  and the third dude is a pussy anyway, so forget him.  bust the main dude in his face maybe six or ten more times fast like you have somewhere to be and it's rush hour.  third dude might push you, so cold sock that dead bitch and be out.  

alright so you didn't get the girl.  and maybe you got caught somehow in the scuffle, little blood in your mouth or something.  nothin shit.  but whatever, you shocked them three dickhole motherfuckers.  on some whatever shit.  thought they were mad big.  nah tho.  YOU'RE WEAK!  teach them pussyclots they get left for dead.

5-0  the whole pL(eague)ace has a messed up muck.  punk sucker ass chumps!  step off watery fowl!
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