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Pre-Game Reconnaissance: Knicks at Nets- 2/12/11

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Jump if you want to know things about the Nets.

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Odds and ends!

- Per HoopData, the Nets run one of the league's worst offense, but have actually defended better than the Knicks have this season.

- The Nets have won 5 of their last 10, including two straight against the Hornets and Bobcats last night.

- Brook Lopez, who averages under 6 rebounds a game, pulled down 11 boards to go with his 31 points in that win over the 'Cats.

- The Knicks handled the Nets pretty easily when these teams last met. Lucious "Devin" Harris went down with a knee injury in the third quarter, and Amar'e Stoudemire's 35 points led the Knicks to an 111-100 win.

Wassup with the Nets!?

I didn't get a chance to communicate directly with the folks at Nets Daily, but here's what they say in today's game preview:

After Friday's results, the Nets have a better record than the Knicks over the last month (7-10 vs. 4-11) as well as since Mikhail Prokhorov ended the 'Melo Drama (7-6 vs. 4-8).  Not that you'd know that.  The media consensus about the Nets is that they're just bad while the consensus about the Knicks is that they've hit a rough stretch.

That said, the Nets have a lot to prove. Their chances of making the playoffs are close to nil while the Knicks remain solidly in the playoff hunt.  Also, the Nets were beaten soundly by the Knicks back in November. Amare Stoudemire scored 35 points and the Knicks broke open a close game right after New Jersey lost point guard Devin Harris to injury.  Brook Lopez, taking advantage of Timofey Mozgov's rawness, scored a season high 36.

Know the opponent!

#43 Kris Humphries: During training camp, Kris convinced his teammates to participate in "Ultimate Basketball", a game of his own invention. Instead of baskets, the baselines serve as "end zones" and you're not allowed to take more than one step after catching a pass. Everybody hated it.

#11 Brook Lopez: Brook would be one of the NBA's best rebounders if the league would just let him use his Spiderman web-shooters.

#22 Anthony Morrow: In public bathrooms, Anthony avoids the toilets and instead urinates into a sink. It's cool, though, because he can get it directly into the drain with zero splashing on the basin from up to 25 feet away. Somehow, this guy isn't in the three-point contest.

#21 Travis Outlaw: Ever since kindergarten, Travis has had an unusual obsession with lamination. Most NBA players manicure their hands very diligently, but only Travis laminates them before every game.

#20 Sasha Vujacic: Sasha often wonders why the hell anybody would want "Lectric Shave".

#18 Ben Uzoh- Ben's favorite anise-flavored liqueur is sambuca. Why do you ask?

A special vocal performance by the Holland Tunnel!

In celebration of tonight's Knicks-Nets match-up, we have a very special guest here to sing us a song. Ladies and gentleman...the Holland Tunnel!


Mrs. Tunnel? Nothing? Okay, that's fine. We'll move on.

Hey Knicks, what's your favorite movie set in New Jersey!?

Toney Douglas: "Mallrats." Fair enough.

Wilson Chandler: "Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle." You would.

Bill Walker: "Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle." I see how it is.

Danilo Gallinari: "Either The Cookout or Garden State." Okay...

Ronny Turiaf: "The Family Man, of course." Oh hell yes. One of Cage's finest.

Amar'e Stoudemire: "Scarface." That doesn't take place in New Jersey. "Fuck you." Okay.

Kelenna Azubuike: "The Land Before Time VI, without question." Wait, what? "Everybody knows Saurus Rock is in Toms River." Oh.

Timofey Mozgov: "Yes, Jersey Shore!". Okay, but what about a movie? "Oh! Yes! Scarface!" Nevermind.

Wilson Chandler is unimpressed by your highlights!

Hey Wilson, that rookie Favors has been pretty solid, eh?

 

Pretty athletic, no?

Boredwil_medium

I don't even know why I bother.

Here is a picture of the opposing coach!

Img-20110212-00031_medium

And now you know about the Nets.

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Comments

Display:

Funniest blogger on SBN

Seth.

Follow me on twitter

I'M GOING H.A.M.

by Jeterian 2 on Feb 12, 2011 4:51 PM EST reply actions   1 recs

Shawne Williams is unimpressed by Morrow's 25ft piss accuracy

Last night, a comedian died in New York. Somebody knows why. Somebody knows

by Rorschach44 on Feb 12, 2011 4:55 PM EST reply actions  

Maybe Morrow should show that trick to Bill Walker...

prob easier cleanup than a towel.

"Madison Square Garden is the ultimate basketball stage. That's where I belong. That's where I live. That's the home of the New York Knicks." - Amar'e Stoudemire

by Chris Child's Fist on Feb 14, 2011 3:49 PM EST up reply actions  

We need to win tonight.

"The biggest thing we talked about is Going Forward. Like I said, the Giants are going to be at the Meadowlands at 4:15 on Sunday afternoon. We’ve got to get ready for them. So what we need to do is learn from what happened in the past and Go Forward, starting this morning with our meetings, our walk-throughs and our practice."

-Jason Garrett, November 10th, 2010.

by Rohpuri on Feb 12, 2011 5:20 PM EST reply actions  

OMG U R NOT FUNNi!!!

ii DONT NO WHY U TRY SO HARD!!!!!!!1

www.biggiantorange.blogspot.com

by solanumbrella on Feb 12, 2011 5:28 PM EST reply actions  

This made me chuckle...

we need the W tonight…

The refs are the reason we lost the Finals in 94...

by I Hate Olajuwon on Feb 12, 2011 5:30 PM EST reply actions  

I love these recon missions.

Sacrface…..Fuck You……

I could totally see Amare doing that, and then staring Seth down until he goes to the next question.

We need this win like Lindsey Lohan needs an intervention.

The Triple Felt Goose movement shall live as long as I am around.

by JerzeeBalla on Feb 12, 2011 5:36 PM EST reply actions  

LETS GO KNICKS

"Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9 Number 9"

by Gelatin on Feb 12, 2011 5:57 PM EST via mobile reply actions  

i wish we had an annoying flag damn you SBN :(

Gang green nation!

lets go get a goddamn snack!

by JETSFANF0RLYF3 on Feb 12, 2011 6:27 PM EST reply actions  

This segment is great

It just gets better and better
Keep it comin seth
Know if only the wins can keep comin

We Are Not A Charity
We Cannot Give Them The Ball

by latishalatoya on Feb 12, 2011 6:31 PM EST via mobile reply actions  

Avery Johnson's mouth looks like a meatball marinara sub.

What time’s tip off?

"It was one of those good, deep sleeps; you know, the ones where you wake up and a stream of drool is steadily racing down your shirt? Yes, that kind of sleep." -Landry Fields

by Thelonious Dunk on Feb 12, 2011 6:44 PM EST reply actions  

Hahaha,

nice, Seth.

Fields, on the follow!

by nygmp42 on Feb 12, 2011 6:58 PM EST reply actions  

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