My Solution - Everybody Wins! :)

Hey friends!! I know we just blew out Detroit again but the Knicks need to make moves RIGHT?! I mean, why not? We tear down and reconstruct the roster every season so why not keep trying until we get it right! After all, fourth time under D'Antoni's a charm! I figured out a way to get everyone what they want AND MORE!! Now we can stop thread fights, snarky gifs, and facepalm pictures!! Blow the shit up.....

BOOM

Knicks get: Phil Jackson, Alvin Gentry, Deron Williams, Danilo Gallinari, OJ Mayo (later waived), Isiah Thomas (Dolan couldn't help himself!)

Nets get: Carmelo Anthony, DWTDD, Bibby

Grizzlies get: Dziedzik (finally they get someone for Mayo!)

Nuggets get: JR Smith & Kenyon Martin (in a China-assisted sign-and-trade w/NY for Gallo - clever move Isiah!)

Suns get: the brothers D'Antoni, Mike Woodson, Phil Weber

FIU gets: Glen Grunwald (the Isiah/Grunwald connection lives on!)

Jeanie Buss gets: Optimum's Ultimate Triple Play free for 12 months, Rangers season tickets, Renaldo Balkman, draft picks, money

Time Warner Cable gets: MSG network free of charge (Dolan too excited to care anymore)

Miami Heat get: OJ Mayo (after waived by NY)

Knicks fans get: MSG network, false hope, irritable bowel syndrome

Salary cap/money between teams gets:........who cares!! BOOORING!! Figure it out NERD!!

Coaching Staff: Zen!, Gentry, Herb Williams (like a rock, son!), Atkinson, those other guys in suits behind the bench I don't know

Starting Five (aka 2011-2012 NBA Champions):

DWill
Fields
Gallo
STAT
Chandler

Bench: Shump, Lin, Walker, Jeffries, Novak, Jordan, Harrelson......BDiddy (how awkward for BDiddy!!)

EQUILIBRIUM ACHIEVED!! HOORAY FOR CHANGE!!