FanPost

Player Hater's Ball, Knicks-Style


Hey everybody, it's your old pal PJCarlisimo's Neck with a FanPost inspired by a conversation I had with a few buddies of mine awhile back.

So it's the middle of the offseason and with nothing other than some Olympic basketball methadone to satisfy our NBA heroin addictions, I thought it might be a good time to discuss the teams/players/coaches/mascots that we the Knick fans hate the most.

For me, there are 5 teams that stand out as the absolute worst of the worst. These are teams that I will never root for, and I feel it's pretty much never OK for any Knick fan to wish anything but pain and suffering on these franchises.

#5. Los Angeles Lakers

This is the irrational hatred pick. The Knicks and Lakers have basically no history with each other since I've been a fan (other than the Chris Childs-Kobe fight). And after all we won both of our championships against LA, so we should feel bad for them, right?

Wrong. I don't like you, Lakers. I don't like your jerk-off Staples Center. I don't like your jerk-off jerseys. I don't like your jerk-off Mark Madsen. And I don't like you, jerk-off.

#4. Chicago Bulls

Nothing irrational about this one. The Bulls are detestable mainly because of how good they were in the 90s. I was a young boy then, and my hate hadn't fully developed yet. But through the magic of NBA Hardwood Classics, youtube, and the like, I've gone back and watched many of those games again, and as an adult I can definitely say that I will always hate the Bulls.


#3. Indiana Pacers

Another 90s nemesis. Ewing's missed finger-roll in '95 is really my first memory as a Knick fan (I was 6 1/2) and it still hurts just as bad as it did then. Of course the Pacers contained the ultimate object of Knick hate in Reggie Miller. And I'm happy to say that Reggie still irritates me to this day with his inane and tone-deaf commentary on TNT once a week. HATE!

#2. Boston Celtics

In the last 2 years the Celtics have inflicted more pain on us Knick fans than I care to remember. So many hateful personalities: Pierce, Garnett, Rondo, Ray Allen's Mom. The worst part about the Celtics is that they seem to relish inflicting pain on the Knicks, Pierce in particular. It's gonna take a mighty hateful team to knock the Celtics off of the top spot on my hate list, but I'm sure you all know who it is.

#1. Miami Heat

P.J. Brown flipping Charlie Ward, JVG hanging off of Alonzo's leg, The Decision, Dwyane Wade's jaw-line. These are all things I hate about the Heat. There's not much else to say. We are Knick fans. We hate the Heat. Two basic, simple sentences that mean so much.

So that's my list. Let's hear who y'all hate the most. I'd love to hear about obscure players that you've always hated but don't really know why. Or just give me your top 5 teams to hate on.

But whatever you do, don't forget to hate.

Comedy Central

(EDIT: R.I.P. Patrice O'Neal)

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