Hawks 107, Knicks 98

Andrew Weber-US PRESSWIRE

The Knicks!

Oh look, the Knicks played another Knicks game! They dominated for large swaths of the evening, moving the ball beautifully through Carmelo Anthony to get him useful looks and to get others openings out of help. But because they are the Knicks and because their heinous war crime of a defense is always waiting to ruin everything when the offense misses a beat, none of the early successes mattered. Nothing mattered. They went down 10, then up 18, then just stood and watched while the Hawks buried deep bombs at a three-point contest pace to take over in the fourth quarter.

This game was a reminder that the Knicks can always get Knicksier. How can a game the Knicks led by 18 in the third quarter contain garbage-time minutes in the other teams' favor? The Knicks. How can Mike Scott (for the second time!) and DeMarre Carroll (invigorated by a tiff with Melo) BOTH hit career-highs in the same game, and both while Jeff Teague was really the Hawks' most dominant offensive player (on a bad ankle)? The Knicks! How can Melo play 37 minutes in his fourth game in five nights-- 170 minutes since Tuesday-- and STILL drop 35 points on 25 shots and STILL lead the Knicks to nothing but a nine-point loss to a horribly slumping, deeply short-handed opponent? The Knicks! How can Tyson Chandler rip down 23 rebounds and Raymond Felton play another solid offensive game and Amar'e Stoudemire score efficiently off the bench and it all amount to nothing. The Knicks!

The Knicks are the Knicksiest Knicks who ever Knicksed. Nobody will ever Knicks this Knicksily, except for the Knicks, who will probably Knicks even Knickslier than this in the near future.

All I have right now is thanks for Clyde and Spero for making this somewhat entertaining. If I didn't have Clyde rhapsodizing about golf (he doesn't have the patience for it, but he does like "the ambience of the course"), reacting to the mention of Greg Buttle's name with "Greg Buttle the former Jet! Ha-HA! I haven't seen Greg in a long time", completely forgetting Tobias Harris's name while referencing his back-and-forth with Melo on Friday night, and noting that Lenny Wilkens "has been inducted to the Hall of Fame THREE times, folks! As a player, as a coach, and...what was the other one?"...I would have nothing. Thank you. We need that.

Not you, Knicks. No thank you. Go away. You're terrible.

Here's a pangolin rolling in some mud.


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