Each Knick season (it seems) there comes a point where despair sets in, and in the afterglow of that sweet, sweet despair, there arises a crystal stainless steel vision in the mind of this humble poster.
IT IS THE ICON OF THE RADICAL SOLUTION. Muthafucka's seriously gleaming right now.
OK, the first one we should discuss, comes from the dude from Queensbridge himself, Metta Ron World Artest Peace!
Head Coach James Dolan
As coach, Dolan would simply do what he does - let his friends play the positions regardless of their actual skill. Hey, it sounds bad, but depending on who Dolan likes, it could actually turn out better. Playing whoever Dolan thinks is cool sounds at least as viable as whatever strategy or lack thereof Woodson's currently using.
Also, if absolutely nothing changed, we would know that Woodson was merely Dolan's puppet.
Re-sign Earl Barron, sign Earl Monroe as coach, and start Pablo, J.R.., Melo, Earl Clark, and Earl Barron. No one knows what would happen with 3 Earls in the same lineup, but it can't be bad, right? I mean, that's a lot of Earls, AmIrite?
Tyson at the 1. Melo at the 2. Tim Jr. at the 3. Pablo at the 4. Ray Felton at the 5. Hear me out - once the other team did the inevitable switch with a pick up top, Felton would get switched onto the opposing point guard! Hm, maybe this isn't such a good idea.
Super Kabongo Attack
Sign Myck Kabongo. Start him and play him 48 minutes. Whenever he gets the ball, have the p.a. announcer yell 'KABONGO' through some sort of delay effect, repeatedly. Perhaps the other team will get so sick of it, they'll forfeit. For road games, start Cole Aldrich and have him yell out 'KABONGO' repeatedly.
OK, now it's your turn. Whatcha got?