A Day At Knicks Practice

(Team huddled up)

Woodson- Ok guys, I know this season has been a hard one for all of us. but i don't think this is over yet. Tyson seems to be picking up the intensity down low, Jr is finally taking a good amount of off balance three's, and we still have car.... wait... where the hell is melo?

(Melo enters on phone)

Carmelo- Ok, MVP and a rookie of the year? That's a good resume...

Woodson- Who is that Malo?

Carmelo- Well look, I've still gotta look at your medical records, and talk to Chris, but I think you've made the short list...

Woodson- Melo would you please get off the phone?

Carmelo- One last thing, How's the knee? okay good good. that's some good news... Oh and you don't have any guns right? That's good too, wouldn't want you to get into any controversy off the court. Ok brother, I'll call you in April....... (Hangs up phone) Sorry woodie, just doing a little business

Raymond- What was that about the gun charges Carmelo, you trying to say something (begins to reach for his waistband)

Carmelo- What? I was referring to Plaxico Burress. I think all big time athletes should know better than to get hit with gun charges. What kind of an idiot does that?

Bargs- In italy, We aren't allowed to hold weapons

Raymond- Carmelo bro I thought we were boys... What the Hell

Carmelo- Sorry bro, I'm just saying... Wait did you get caught with an illegal handg...

Woodson- ENOUGH. Carmelo, Was that Derrick Rose on the phone?

Shannon Brown- Who's that?

Woodspn- You played with him in Chicago... He won the rookie of the year the one year... Shannon how the hell could you not know who that is?

Pablo- Hehe Shannon is a girl's name

Shannon- Yeah, well I'd rather have Pablo Sanchez than Pablo Prigioni...

Pablo- Take that back...

(Shannon and Pablo begin a girly slap fight)

JR busts through the door

JR Smith- Aiit Amar'e, we even now

Amar'e- What?

JR- You think you can smack talk me, Im just gon' get you back

(News comes on the top of the jumbotron in the garden, subtitles flash)

This just in, A source says Amar'e Stoudemire has admitted to a sexual relationship with NFL prospect Michael Sam

(Whole Team busts out in laughter)

Amar'e- What.... What's the joke?

JR- Amar'e it was just up there?

Amar'e- Wait... Rewind that and someone read it to me

whole team sighs

Woodson- Who the hell is bouncing that basketball?

Toure Murray turns around

Woodson- Who the hell are you?

Murray- Uh.. Im Toure.. Im one of the backup guards... I played PG at Witchita State last year.. Led us to the final four...

Melo- Final 4 LOL

Felton- Final 4 LOL

Cole Aldrich- Final 4 LOL

Chandler/ STAT simultaneously- College LOL

Tyler- High School LOL

Woodson- This is ridiculous, I don't care who you are, stop shooting, and run the play..

Murray- Iso Melo?

Woodson- Yes, Carmelo get in ther... DAMMIT

Carmelo (on phone again)- So you're telling me, I can have Chris and Cliff passing me the ball? This might be a deal breaker...

Woodson- Is that the clippers?

Carmelo- That's a deal... woo... Can't wait to be in the red and white next year

Chandler- (Snatches phone from Melo) Chris! oh thank God, hey it's Tyson Chandler, you think you can get me a job too?

Chris Paul- He.. Chan... I. Think. we're. U...p...

Chandler- NOO! CHRIS!


Chandler- Like a good neighbor... State farm is there

Cliff Paul pops up

Cliff- Hey there, i'm your local state fa.... oh shit

(Cliff picks up basketball and throws it down the court... Every single player runs for it)

Cliff- Now that's what I call an Assist

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