Editor's note: If I could, I'd make Barnesgasm do all the recaps. Kid makes me look bad.

To sum up, the Knicks played 46 minutes of good ball, and had a bunch of chances to tie it up in the last five minutes of the game, but, well, didn't, and the Hornets closed out the game on a 10-0 run in the last two minutes.

Coming into tonights game, the Knicks had won the last SEVEN games I had attended, excluding a preseason game they had won, dating back to a game against the Raptors near the beginning of last season. I did the math before the game, and the chances of me attending seven Knicks wins with no losses is roughly equivalent to the odds of me winning the lottery while fucking Jessica Simpson while riding a magical space dolphin inside a small body of water on an asteroid. If you think about it, that's a pretty bum deal for the space dolphin.

I'm not sure how, but I've developed a freakshow abiliy to name the rosters of NBA teams. I thought I was fucking up when I could only name 13 Hornets... turns out the Hornets only have 13 players. I am like Zeus.

Malik Rose starts. Normally, my astounding wit would allow me to make some type of humorous remark, but Malik Rose starting is the least funny thing ever to have happened in the history of mankind.

Someday, David West will score 130 points on midrange jumpers, and it will have the most boring highlight reel ever.

Name train: Zach Randolph Morris Peterson.

Oh, the ticket stub has a picture of Mardy Collins on it, which pretty much guaranteed the loss. Apparantly, his role on the team is "The Apprentice", and his alias is "Old School". They also have an image of his fingerprint on the ticket stub. I hope police use this evidence to link Mardy Collins to a crime.

Jared Jeffries finishes a buzzer-beating dunk at the end of the first half, which seems to me like it should be impossible, because if you're dunking the ball, shouldn't there still be time left on the clock? I dunno. Seems wrong.

Eddy Curry and Nate Robinson had diesel first halves, with Eddy acting like a big man and Nate acting like Nate. Wilson Chandler knocked down some open jumpers, and shit like that. He also had a monster slam on a fast break.

Malik Rose is such garbage. I don't have a problem with players who have bad jumpers. I have a problem with players who think they do have good jumpers. Gahh. Why he would dribble or shoot or do really anything is besides me.

David Lee tips in a shot off the defensive boards. Like, blatantly tipped it in. David West was running down the other end of the court, but he got credit for the bucket. If any other player in a Knick uniform scored two points for the other team, the place would've just gone off with boos.

The Randolph Morris story:
I love Randolph Morris. First off, the dude is in a world of his own. I first saw that he was in warmups when I saw him around 8 feet outside the huddle and looked into space. I also spent the entire halftime shootaround watching him. He spent most of the time fucking around with a ball in the corner, doing freaky crossover dribbles to himself, and tossing the ball onehandedly at the hoop like a baseball. I like to think he was giggling to himself under his breath. The question is: how high was Randolph Morris? I think that's gonna be a poll at the bottom. Man, I love polls.

And then, with about ten minutes gone in the third... it was Randolph Morris time. He strode valiantly onto the court, and, pretty much, didn't do anything. He recorded his first rebound of the year and missed three shots. One shot bounced twice on the rim, before it realized that it was too soon, and that the world would have to wait for Randolph Morris' brilliance, so it bounced out.

Oh, and last Randolph thought: A question popped up on the board, asking: "What is Randolph Morris' favorite place he has been to?" The choices were Italy, South Dakota, Atlanta, the Turks and Caicos, and someplace else I forget. Anyways, my friends and I just looked around like "well, where could he get the rawest herb", and we decided it was the ATL.

It was South Dakota. Randolph Morris fucking loves South Dakota. They showed a superimposed picture of a really happy Randolph Morris in front of Mt. Rushmore. I think it's safe to say that while this was going on , I was extraordinarily entertained. I love Randolph Morris.

Renaldo Balkman? Didn't play. Mardy Collins and Malik Rose? Played a lot. In his defense, Malik Rose did hit a three point play, meaning that somewhere on the planet earth, an innocent creature breathed its final breath.

Who? MIKE JAMES!

Strange music choice: "Move, Bitch", when Eddy Curry scores. I seem to remember discussing this on here, but I feel it should be noted that Mystikal drops a terrible, terrible verse on that song. It's like he just says the first random things he can think of. I'm writing a post about Mystikal on my site, so it's in my mind.

This is the part of the post where I vent my fucking anger and frustration. With about three minutes left, the score was 88-90. The Knicks had 3 opportunities to tie the game. My memory isn't perfect, but I think those plays ended in: A hoisted Jamal 3, a shitty pass by Eddy Curry leaving Nate Robinson with the ball in terrible position with one second on the shotclock, and a David Lee runner. The final score of the game was 100-88.

With two minutes left, and the team down four, Isiah Thomas removed Nate Robinson in exchange for Wilson Chandler. Now, I like Wilson. But Nate Robinson was the second leading scorer, and, quite frankly, was on fire. He rightfully went to the bench and threw a friggin hissy fit. I think it was wrong of the crowd to boo this decision - imagine how Wilson felt - but still. Isiah, I fucking hate you. Nate played a great game, is the only motherfucker who hustled. And you took him out.

Chris Paul is ridiculous. He didn't need to try to score for wide stretches of the game.

So... that's it. Apparantly, today was Seth's birthday, so, wish the man a happy birthday. I guess that means I still have an hour to buy him a gift. I think I'll get him the blueprints to Malik Rose's house and some ski-masks, and then he can do whatever he wants with that information, but don't blame me when bad things happen, cuz I had nothing to do with it.