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Your NBA All-Star Weekend Schedule!

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The Melo stuff is going to attract a lot of attention over the next few days, but don't let it sap your enjoyment of All-Star weekend. Personally, I'm gonna try and revert to ignoring the whole story until something actually happens. Anyway, here is the schedule of events this weekend, with those featuring Knicks highlighted for your convenience.

Tonight:

7 PM- Celebrity Game: Knicks legend Jalen Rose will be participating!

9 PM- Rookie Game: LANDRY FIELDS WILL SCORE ALL THE POINTS AND REBOUND ALL THE REBOUNDS. ALL OTHERS PARTICIPATING AND IN ATTENDANCE WILL KNEEL AT HIS FEET OR PERISH. (Amar'e Stoudemire will coach the rookies, by the way.)

Saturday Night:

8 PM- Shooting Stars: Naptime.

After that- Skills Competition: How Timofey Mozgov wasn't invited to this is beyond me. Continue napping.

After that- Three-Point Contest: Take at least one poop during this out of respect for Shawne Williams.

After that- Dunk Contest: Wake up from your nap.

Sunday Night:

8 PM- All-Star Game: Amare!

And that's that. Don't let the rumors get you down. There will be a thread up tonight for the rookie game. <3.