Balls? Oh, BULLS. Got it.
What's up with the Bulls?
From the friendly man behind Blog-a-Bull:
The Bulls (or at least their fanbase) are in a strange position of seeing a great regular season almost seem like a chore. No matter how many games they win behind their superlative defense and Derrick Rose's brilliance, it's all about a rematch with the Miami Heat in the Eastern Conference finals. The differences in winning that matchup this season were to be due to increased comfort between Carlos Boozer and Joakim Noah, and the acquisition of Rip Hamilton. Thus far neither has gone well. Hamilton has looked very good as a safety valve for Rose in the half-court, and an unexpectedly great transition player and passer, but age and injury has dogged him all season to where he's now been shut down until deemed completely healthy. Boozer and Noah still haven't figured things out, as it seems that as though while Boozer can still be effective, it's exclusively as a high-post player shooting jumpers, the position on the court Joakim Noah also needs to roam in to be at his best. Even keeping the status quo from last season may be difficult, as both Rose and their second-best player, Luol Deng, have injuries that may last the entire season. Rose is seemingly over his turf toe injury, but it could return at any time, and we've yet to see Luol Deng since he decided to rest (as opposed to repair) the torn ligament in his non-shooting wrist. All this said, the Bulls are still very good, with the depth and size to be able manhandle most opponents even through such adversity. But it doesn't feel quite right until the known holes are fixed, and that may not be proven until the playoffs actually start.
Meet the (few) new Bulls!
Jimmy Butler- Jimmy travels with several dozen pocket-sized bottles of flavored syrups to make all of his meals and even some of his acquaintances and household objects taste like sweet, delicious candies.
Richard Hamilton- Richard, even after twelve years of playing and traveling with NBA teams, claps his hands together and squeals "Ooh, are we going to FLY in that thing?" every time he sees the Bulls' team plane.
Adventures in Impersonating Joakim Noah on Omegle
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: yo
You: what's up
Stranger: just chilling you /
Stranger: ?
You: you know, just doing my hair and preparing for tonight
Stranger: why what are youi doing
You: playing a basketball game
You: gotta make sure my hair is as revolting as possible
You: facial hair, too
Stranger: haha i love basketball where you from
You: originally? new york
You: i live in chicago now
You: although i'm back in new york at the moment
Stranger: ahh i live in britain whats your basketball team called
You: the bulls
You: i have a couple friends from britain
Stranger: nice
You: this guy luol and my old friend ben who moved
Stranger: ahh cool do you no what part
You: luol is from brixton
You: well he's from sudan, but he moved there
Stranger: ohh im from nottingham
You: ben's from somewhere in london, not sure where
You: oh, very nice
You: london is beautiful
Stranger: its ok new york is much better
You: yes, new york is pretty great
Stranger: ive always wanted to go
You: just get really tall and good at basketball
Stranger: haha
You: and then get drafted and you can play in or visit new york
Stranger: how old are you then
You: 26
You: though i kinda style myself to look like a giant pubescent girl
Stranger: why
You: because it's hilarious
Stranger: haha so are you a proffesional basketball player
You: yes indeed
Stranger: oh and you play for chicago bulls
You: you got it
Stranger: nice man who are you
You: my name's joakim
Stranger: joakim noah?
You: yeah that's me!
Stranger: sick man
You: yeah thanks
Stranger: are you playing th knicks
You: yeah we're playing them tonight
Stranger: what time
You: 8 pm eastern
You: not sure what that is in london
You: fuckin crack o dawn probably
Stranger: oh how many hours till you play
You: about 3 and a half
Stranger: yeh its a bout one in the morning when you play good luck pal
You: hey thanks
You: i'll need it
You: it's been kind of a rough season for me
Stranger: how many baskets you scored this season so far
You: like total baskets?
Stranger: yes
You: shit, i don't know!
You: probably like a couple hundred
Stranger: nice man
You: it's not like soccer where people tend to total how many times you score
You: football, sorry
Stranger: haha i dont mind and how come your on omegle if your rich
You: what, rich people can't converse with strangers over the internet?
You: i'm bored!
Stranger: haha i thought you would be training
You: and i'm waiting for all these boogers that i put in my hair to dry
You: well, we had a shootaround. and i'll get to the arena early to warm up
You: gotta rest sometimes
Stranger: haha im quite lucky to be talking to a pro basketball player
You: hey i'm quite lucky to be talking to a friendly londoner
Stranger: im not from london im from nottingham but thanks
You: oh wow i totally mixed up nottingham with notting hill
You: my mistake
You: here i was picturing you as like hugh grant
Stranger: haha
You: oh well
Stranger: i bet your house cost like 10 million dollors
You: it's pretty sweet
You: lots of supreme chill spots
You: i have some fish
You: can't complain
Stranger: nice man i have fish i have 2 ponds
You: wow man that's more ponds than i have
Stranger: haha but i bet yours is like 2 miles long]
You: nah, i have no ponds, but i could definitely have a 2-mile pond if i wanted to
You: fill that shit with barracudas
Stranger: hahalucky guy
Stranger: haha
Stranger: do you have any pest besides fish
Stranger: pets*
You: no but i'd like a monkey and maybe a robot dolphin
You: and a toucan that will smoke weed with me
Stranger: haha that woud be cool
Stranger: isnt smoking weed bad for basketball
You: so they say
Stranger: oh well life goes on
You: you got it
Stranger: what shoes do you wear for games
You: i wear these french ones
You: le coq sportif!
Stranger: ahh
You: yeah that's just a sporty rooster
Stranger: yhyh there nice the red ojnes
Stranger: ones
You: thanks
Stranger: i bet your using some amazing computer or laptop
You: it's a pretty normal laptop
You: covered in stickers
You: also, i affixed a cupholder
Stranger: haha nice
You: aight i gotta take off man
You: peace
Stranger: peace good luck for tonight hope you win bro
You: thanks man
You have disconnected.
Knicks-Bulls Connexions
Bulls coach Tom Thibodeau spent seven years as an assistant coach for the Knicks.
Knicks Center Tyson Chandler spent the first five years of his career with the Bulls.
Bulls assistant coach Rick Brunson was an All-Star and averaged 28 points per game as a member of the 2000-2001 Knicks.
As a ninth-grader, Knicks guard Jeremy Lin briefly copied the cornrowed hairstyle of Bulls guard Richard Hamilton.
Bulls guard Kyle Korver, Knicks center Jerome Jordan, and Knicks forward Jared Jeffries all attend the same "Alliteratives Anonymous" meetings each month.
Knicks guard Bill Walker and Bulls guard C.J. Watson have their taxes done by the same CPA orangutan.
Knicks forward Josh Harrellson and Bulls guard John Lucas III have, on separate occasions, attempted to shoot and kill the same common pheasant.
Steve Novak Has a Beautiful Mind
Luol Deng of the Bulls wears the number 9. Chicago's 9th most-used lineup John Lucas III, Omer Asik, Ronnie Brewer, and Taj Gibson. The first letters of their first names, when combined spell "JORT".
Jort.
Coincidence? Or conspiracy?
And now you're ready for Knicks-Bulls!