Bros before (less talented) bros: An alternative to Chris Smith

From Google:

nep·o·tism

ˈ

nepəˌtizəm

noun

1. 1.

   the practice among those with power or influence of favoring relatives or friends, esp. by giving them jobs.

...which brings us to Chris Smith. The Knicks have one spot left to fill on their regular-season roster. Now that the front offense has crushed our collective heart by cooling their interest in Hamed Haddadi (Dolan must have finally gotten around to seeing Argo), there is a small chance that spot might just go to the only male in the Smith clan not named "Earl."

Here's the thing, though: I watched Chris in Summer League, you watched Chris in Summer League, Glen Grunwald watched Chris in Summer League. The guy just isn't an NBA-level player. He was perhaps the fifth-best player on a Knicks Summer League squad that nearly set the league record for single-game margin of defeat. Bloodlines aside, Chris is not "So Right", or quite right, or even vaguely right.

Now, it's important to remember that Chris is in no way guaranteed a spot on the regular season roster. He's just invited to training camp. But since the front office seems dead-set on getting some brothers into camp, I thought I'd do a little amateur scouting and find a superior candidate.

El hermano de Pablo

I've expounded on this one before, but the idea of a dos-Prigioni lineup fills me with felicidad. Pablo is already the NBA's premier inbound pass ninja - two Pablos would be downright unfair:

Prig 1: "Don't worry, mi amigo, you can inbound the ball. I'm all the way over here...

Prig 2: "...or am I over here!" -swipes ball-

The Knicks will win every game by shutout!

The question now is whether or not Pablo even has a brother. A quick Google search reveals this man, Martin Prigioni. He looks rather Pablo-esque, if you ask me. Apparently he is two years older than Pablo...which is great, because I was starting to worry the Knicks didn't have enough old people this season.

This website seems to indicate that he played basketball at some point. His position is listed as "Pívot", which I assume to be like an NBA pivot, but with an irresistible Latin flair. This probably means the Prigioni brothers have spent a lifetime running the pick-and-roll together. Just try to imagine the possibilities of the Prig-and-roll! It would be like a regular pick-and-roll, only it would take up the entire shot clock as the brothers keep deferring to one another:

Pablo: "It is your turn to shoot, Martin."

Martin: "You are too kind, Pablo. But I must insist you shoot this time."

Pablo: "But you shot last time. It would be rude of me to impose."

Martin: "You make a fair case, Pablo. Fine, I will shoot this time, but you must promise me you will shoot next time."

Pablo: "I promise. Te quiero, Martin."

Martin: "Te quiero, Pablo." - shoots, scores. Dos puntos -

Given all this information, I think it's now safe to calculate the Knicks' in-game performance with both Pablo and Martin in the starting lineup. Since the brothers will immediately steal each inbound pass and take up 24 seconds to score on each Prig-and-roll, the Knicks will win every game of the season by a score of 240-0. Of course, that doesn't take fouls into account...they could obviously score more.

Clearly, the Knicks are only one brother away from an 82-0 regular season...and, trust me, that player is not Chris Smith.