Once upon a time, the New York Knicks went into Cleveland and defeated the heavily favored Cavaliers in Lebron James' return to his home state. It was a stirring victory in the first road game of Derek Fisher's coaching career, and it portended a New York team that would not wilt away from Madison Square Garden.
And then they were all like, "SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKE!"
That glorious evening in Cleveland remains the Knicks only road win to date. Friday night's humiliation at the hands of Oklahoma City marked the team's eighth consecutive defeat away from the friendly confines of MSG. They were shut out for the entire month of November.
This club is in the midst of fourth-longest road losing streak of the Dolan era, which is pretty damn impressive given the legacy of incompetence handed down by their forebears.
(Quick tangent: The Knicks have had 32 losing streaks of at least five games in the past 15 years. That seems like a lot.)
And I have some more bad news for those fans who aren't already fully on the tanking bandwagon: The Knicks can't count on a trip to Philly to halt this skid. They will not play the Sixers until Jan. 21 -- a span of 13 road games -- which means that, if they don't want this losing streak to break 20, they'll have to defeat an actual professional basketball team on its home turf.
Let's check their road slate for December (via Basketball-Reference) to see if there is any hope:
Yikes. There are only two games that look even remotely winnable -- maybe three, if you squint your eyes just so.
The Charlotte Hornets are just about as lousy as the Knicks are these days, having lost nine games in a row. New York did come away with a win in their only meeting so far this season, in a close game marred by a questionable five-second violation in the closing seconds.
This matchup probably comes down to the health of Carmelo Anthony's back. If he's good to good by next Friday, the Knicks have a chance. If not, um...
The New Orleans Pelicans are technically under .500, but a 7-8 Western Conference team is essentially a title contender in the East. Anthony Davis against the Knicks' frontcourt? NOPE!
Finally, we come to the Dec. 12 showdown in Boston. The Celtics are bad, particularly on defense (26th in the NBA in D-Rating). Of course, that is one place higher than the Knicks' D...so they got that going for them.
Personally, I can't give a Knicks club of this level of ineptitude the benefit of the doubt heading into Boston. There's simply too much evil there. Tommy Heinsohn will likely be cackling up a storm come the 12th.
If New York can't pull out a win in one of those games, we could be in for a long, painful month. The Knicks will be huge underdogs in their remaining December road games.
So what do you think, dear friends? Do you see the Knicks breaking this road losing streak in the next few games, or do you think they will fart their way through another month of futility?