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The Knicks' individual media day photos, captioned

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Robert Deutsch-USA TODAY Sports

People often wonder why players do Media Day in full uniform-- sleeves and headbands and all. It's because Media Day for the players is half about fielding questions from reporters and half about posing for team pictures and video promos and stuff. And look at that, the team pictures turned up in P&T's photo tool! Let's caption them!

(All photos by Robert Deutsch, USA TODAY Sports)

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"Yes, I'm on the Knicks. The fuck kind of question is that?"

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"Get chicks or die trying."

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"I can see the secrets in your brain when I just look into your eyes. I have all your secrets now."

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"As a matter of fact, it takes $125 a week worth of pomade and a team of four artisanal groomers trained overseas to look this hungover."

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I'm not gonna make any pretend quotes about this one because I'm seriously scared.

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"Is this the part of Media Day where we fart? I'm not sure whether I'm sup-- oh, guys, I'm already farting."

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"Hi, I'm Tim Hardaway Jr..."

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"...and I know..."

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"...exactly one facial expression."

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"You've got an eyelash. It's fine, it's just, like, really hard to concentrate on killing this camera lens right now with you totally off your game."

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"Yeah, it's cool, if I just lean back a bit I can see over the beard just fine."

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"Hey, I have an idea. How about I take some pictures of you?"

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"Hi, it's me!"

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"Me, silly! Langston Galloway!"

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"Here how about now? With the basketball? You don't remember  me from those layups I hit in Summer League?"

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"Great, now we'll do a few dozen more 'wise but tough' from my left side then move on to the 'contemplatively fierce' shots."

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"If you wanna wrestle, we can wrestle. I don't think you wanna wrestle, bud. Wanna know how I got this scab on my elbow? Wrestling. The other guy has more scabs and they're way bigger."

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"Hi, I'm basketball legend Samuel Dalembert. Did you know juvenile-onset eczema affects one in seventeen juveniles?"

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"Oh yeah, it's fart time. Farts o'clock. I ate a toucan for breakfast, so these are gonna be funky. Because I'm rich, that's why."

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"Prigioni is number 9, right? Can you-- sorry, can you have him take the picture after me? No reason!"

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"It was for sexy reason."

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"Shane Larkin. Running back. THE running back, y'all."

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"Guess what I'm wearing under my uniform. Nothing. Totally naked!"

IMPORTANT UPDATE: