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THE SQUARE ROOT SEASON LIVES

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All signs pointed to the Knicks winning tonight for the first time since roughly 1996. Carmelo Anthony and Amar'e Stoudemire both opted in while Anthony Davis and Jrue Holiday sat. And of course...

The Knicks were 5-36 coming into this one. Tonight was win or RUIN MATH, and the Knicks weren't gonna spit in the face of math like that.

Amar'e and Melo both produced in full-ish minutes, Langston Galloway balled the fuck out as a shooter and pick-and-roll runner, Lou Amundson SCRAPPED, and Lance Thomas looked pretty comfortable in the Triangle. I hope those last two guys did enough to get picked up by other teams when the Knicks release them later this week, which...sorry, Lance and Lou, I hope they do that. The Knicks won 99-92, by the way.

Jason Smith also led the team in assists but we mustn't speak of this.

But yeah, the Knicks didn't manage to lose this one. The Pelicans couldn't hit enough open threes down the stretch to fully close what had been a double-digit gap. It had all the usual vibes of a "oh man could the Knicks actually pull this off?" failed comeback, but, ya know, in reverse. The Pelicans couldn't get it done no matter how much New York helped them and Jose Calderon hit a huge three to seal the victory. Square roots forever.

Alas, a speed bump for the tank. It was bound to happen eventually, and the Knicks really seemed to enjoy themselves, which was fun. Wins are fun now and then.

HUGE tanking game coming up on Wednesday against the Sixers. Full recap of this one from Joe later.