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Robin Lopez crushes everything

Not just mascots. Baskets and people, too.

William Hauser-USA TODAY Sports

Hey! I thought this was a fun Marc Berman article. Robin Lopez is an excellent interview, and so too are Derek Fisher and Carmelo Anthony, at least when you ask them about Robin Lopez. The article amounts to "Robin Lopez is physical as hell and it gets kinda scary."

Derek Fisher lists things Lopez is wont to smash:

"All tables, stanchions and what appears to be immovable objects should get out of the way when he gets scored on."

Lopez admits to being a stanchion-basher:

"I go after the back of the basket pretty fiercely,'' Lopez said. "It's padded so I know it's safe.''

And Carmelo Anthony sounds very thankful to now be benefiting from hard screens and pointy elbows:

"I hated him as an opponent — a helluva pick-and-roll guy who set crazy screens. I used to think it was dirty, but now I think they are clean.''

Berman declined to interview the bruised, weeping basket stanchion.

Anyway, there's more in there about Lopez's fit and his feelings about life and defense. I'm happy to have this guy around, and it's evident already that he'll be "setting the tone" in camp. And possibly "setting a bone," ya know? Or breaking a bone, I guess. Like hurting somebody because he's so physical. Setting is what you do *after* breaking a bone to repair it, so that doesn't make sense. I just wanted it to rhyme. You don't have to read this anymore, I'm done.