A thorough critique of Robin Lopez's weak-ass Doc Brown costume

Robin Lopez was the crown jewel of the Knicks' 2015 free agent class, and so far he has impressed, displaying his well-documented defensive prowess along with a surprisingly strong offense.

Of course, Phil Jackson didn't sign the big man to play basketball; they wanted his cosplaying talents. There is no preseason when it comes to dressing up like comic book and sci-fi characters; you've got to bring your A game every damn night. With that in mind, let's compare Lopez's Doc Brown ensemble from New York Comic Con with Christopher Lloyd's original.

This appears to be a fine representation...to the untrained eye. Color me unimpressed, however. Lopez scores highly on some of the more obvious aspects -- jacket, shirt, boots, future glasses* -- but cosplay is all about the subtle details. Perhaps they don't teach that in a diploma factory like Stanford.

* Since we're now in the time period in which Doc Brown procured his future glasses, shouldn't we call them "present glasses"? Or did I just blow your mind?

Here are some of Lopez's biggest offenses:

1. Dude is clearly wearing Marty McFly's wristwatch. This is the equivalent showing up to Comic Con rocking Geordi La Forge's visor with a Riker beard. Tacky and gauche.
2. The hair is all wrong. We get it, man...you've got a wild hairdo. But not all frizzy locks are the same. Would it have killed you to straighten your hair and dye it white? Total lack of commitment on your part.
3. Pants too tight, socks all wrong. What is this: amateur hour?
4. Comic book artist on his right doing kung fu poses. I don't recall Donnie Yen or Jet Li making a cameo in any of the Back to the Future films.
5. Why didn't he bring Brook Lopez along, dressed as Einstein the dog? What's the point of playing in the same city as your twin brother if you don't drag him to Comic Con dressed as a dog? The entire Lopez family failed on this one.

On a scale of zero to 1.21 gigawatts, I give Robin 0.38 gigawatts for this effort -- not nearly enough juice to power the flux capacitor. You better pick up a Mr. Fusion, snag some plutonium from the Libyans, and come correct next time. Play me off, Huey Lewis...