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Knicks 107, Rockets 102: Scenes from Kristaps Kristaps Kristaps Kristaps

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Troy Taormina-USA TODAY Sports

This is the post where I show you a bunch of neat videos from the basketball game but I think I'm too excited to do things on the Internet? Would you accept a video of me bashing my head through the window in my living room and screaming KRISTAAAAAAPS at the people on the street? No? Okay.

The Knicks beat the Rockets. The Rockets didn't have Dwight Howard, but they had James Harden and all their shooters, and those guys are all pretty good, if weirdly kinda sluggish at horrible moments. (It's great. I love it. Do not mistake the previous sentence for concern.)

New York and Houston played a very even game -- both teams hit a great portion of threes, rebounded a great portion of threes, and took care of the ball. The Knicks just executed better (yes!) down the stretch, made some brilliant defensive plays, got some balanced scoring, and...

...and...

KRISTAPS.

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S.

24 points, 14 rebounds, SEVEN blocks, and just 1 foul in 36 minutes (which...man, that's a lot of minutes for the rookie, but god bless.) Other dudes mattered. Carmelo Anthony looked a bit lame, but defended wisely and made a great play to draw a goaltend in the final seconds. Jose Calderon hit his threes and so did Arron Afflalo and Langston Galloway. Lance Thomas played some truly brilliant defense. But man, Kristaps. Kristaps.

Kristaps?

Kristaps!

When I close my eyes, I see Kristaps, and when I open them, I see Kristaps. I have Kristaps where my hands and feet are supposed to be. I just tried to go across the street to the bodega and buy a Snapple but the only drink they had available was Kristaps and the guy behind the counter was Kristaps and all the money in my wallet had pictures of Kristaps. Sometimes when I Kristaps, I Kristaps my Kristaps with a Kristaps in mystaps oh no I can't Kristops. Dammit. Kristaps. I can't stops Kristyping his name Kristaps. I have Kristaps to end this Krisnow becaustaps I'm losing Krintrol Kristaps of Krismy bodyKristaps. Staps. Kristaps. KRISTAPS. Krishelp me. KRISTAPS. Kristaps. KRISTAPS. kristaps

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