TANKWATCH 3/05: Kevin Garnett is still a dumb baby and other relevant news

The Knicks had a quaint, pleasant diversion on the road to Tanksville last week with those two wins, but they're back in business after two straight blowouts. No harm, no foul...right?

WRONG!

This is tanklife, son! You can't distracted by things like "not embarrassing yourselves." That little dalliance with lady victory cost the Knicks serious momentum in the Tankathon standings:

TANK NEWS:

- The Denver Nuggets looked like a tanking dark horse last weekend when stories like these leaked to the Denver Post:

A fourth-quarter huddle late in the Nuggets' 104-82 loss to the Utah Jazz on Friday broke with this phrase: "1-2-3 ... six weeks!"

As in six weeks to go until the end of the season. That's 24 games, 46 days and 1,152 minutes away.

Tax day, April 15, is getaway day: the last day of the Nuggets' season. Rest assured, there are players who are already counting.

But then they canned Brian Shaw and ripped off two wins in a row to put my mind at ease. So thanks, Nuggets!

- One of those two Denver wins came against one of our arch-nemeses in the tank: the Minnesota Timberwolves. Let's check in on the vaunted "culture change" that is supposed to come with their trade for Kevin Garnett. On one hand, they've lost four games in a row; on the other hand, KG is teaching them how to lose like a bunch of whiny toddlers (h/t Ball Don't Lie):

Did you kind of expect Denver to come out with that life, that zip after the last two days?

No, to be honest. they quit on Brian Shaw. I thought, you know, they'd quit again. A quitter is a quitter. That was my take on that. But if you've got any kind of self-pride about your future, then you want to anticipate someone playing hard.

Please, NBA, I beg you...put that on his Hall of Fame plaque:

Kevin Garnett

Played 21 seasons

Accused an opponent of quitting minutes after losing to said opponent

Giant, massive douche

- The 76ers released JaVale McGee, then took the Thunder to overtime at home. Now he simply floats in the ether. Contenders are always looking for bigs, but JaVale could really help a tanking club tank even harder.

NEXT WEEK'S SCHEDULE

The Knicks return home to face the same Pacers team that waxed them on Wednesday night...only this time they will have Roy Hibbert. Then they head West for a back-to-back against the suddenly-frisky Nuggets and the rugged Jazz. The good news is that they'll probably lose; the bad news is that we'll get another reminder that the Knicks passed over Rudy Gobert to draft Tim Hardaway Jr.

Tank on, brothers and sisters!