In the weeks leading up to the NBA draft lottery, P&T has become a haven of devout, cultish beliefs and practices. We've got envelopes in our freezers. We wrote letters to bad (but innocent) Knicks draft picks. Now I'm here to suggest a horse might give us some answers today.
See, I awoke this morning having experienced a sleeping epiphany. I realized this: Every horse in the Kentucky Derby has a post number, and the post number of the winner determines the draft pick the Knicks will earn in the Mat 19th lottery, but only if Ocho Ocho Ocho wins. This is Ocho Ocho Ocho, a horse:
(Jamie Rhodes-USA TODAY Sports)
Look how graceful and horselike he is. His post number is 1. If he wins the Kentucky Derby (at 50/1 odds), that means the Knicks will get the number 1 pick. If he doesn't win the Kentucky Derby, that means horses are just shitty horses and don't predict where the Knicks will pick. It's crazy, but it's true. Thank you for your time.