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New York is head over heels for Kristaps Porzingis, and by the time he wins his third MVP in 2018 we'll all be inundated with New Yorker thinkpieces on how he's the quintessential 21st-century NYCer. But we're not the only ones in love with him. Liepāja loved him first, and loves him still. Once known as "the city where the wind was born," Liepāja recently put up billboards honoring their newest, greatest legacy. THAT'S RIGHT. Kristaps > wind.
#WelcomeToMyHometown pic.twitter.com/AH7ykaXXLA
— NY_KnicksPR (@NY_KnicksPR) January 12, 2016
The first thing you'll note is the snow. Liepājans can only be born in cold climates, due to their being on-fire the moment they emerge from the womb. Liepājan obstetricians must wear Ove Gloves whenever they deliver a baby.
#WelcomeToMyHometown pic.twitter.com/KldP3t32EB
— NY_KnicksPR (@NY_KnicksPR) January 12, 2016
Liepājans are preternaturally strong. The two men here had their truck die on the way to mounting this billboard. One carried the truck the rest of the way while the other entertained himself playing hacky sack with the billboard.
#WelcomeToMyHometown pic.twitter.com/8cay48LRsH
— NY_KnicksPR (@NY_KnicksPR) January 12, 2016
As seen in the tweet above, the average Liepājan is 8'2". Kristaps will never stop growing. One day he'll be tall enough to patch up the ozone layer. Millions of years from now, our dying sun will come eye-to-eye with KP. Invigorated, it will revert back to its prime years and usher in an endless Pax Humana.
#WelcomeToMyHometown pic.twitter.com/jHdY5SZ0Pt
— NY_KnicksPR (@NY_KnicksPR) January 12, 2016
Liepājans are natural camouflagers. There are 111 of them hiding in the tweet above. How many do you see?
Time to step up our game stateside. We see the love Porzingis is getting from his biological hometown. But what about his adopted hometown. What's up, P&T? What are YOU doing to spread the gospel according to Kristaps?