Celtics 110, Knicks 89: “Are we supposed to watch?”

Let me let y’all in on a little secret...

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I’M REALLY PISSED OFF RIGHT NOW. Not only did the Knicks lose tonight by 21 points, but they were embarrassed by the Boston Celtics. In the STD Garden.

The team started the game poorly, allowing the Celtics to dig their feet on defense and steal the ball any chance they got. Just to compound the issue, several Enes Kanter turnovers in the first set the philanthropic tone for the Knicks throughout the game. The Celtics were allowed to dominate the paint and let the Knicks brick threes en route to an early double-digit lead. The rest of the game saw both teams exchanging buckets enough to somehow consistently maintain a 20 point deficit. As Read React queried in the game thread, were we supposed to just watch? I know who did:

The Knicks came into the game tonight looking to get their first win of the season. Tim Hardaway Jr. looked to get his game back on track after shooting horrendously in thus far. Kristaps Porzingis sought to grab his third straight 30-point game (to solidify himself after Shaq as the second youngest player ever to start a season with three straight 30 point games). Needless to say, absolutely none of these were accomplished. The Knicks lost the game halfway through the first quarter. Hardaway struggled with his shot yet again, bricking every jumper until late in the final quarter. And our precious Unicorn scored a grand total of 12 points in 32 minutes. This was probably the highest point of the game:

The only thing that could have made this game any worse is if Clyde was not announcing. Oh wait. At least Marcus Smart didn’t play in this game, although I would have loved to witness Porzingis throw it down in his misshapen face. There isn’t much else to say about this game, so let’s hand out some awards, shall we!

Knick of the Night: Enes Kanter. The Big Turk gravitated to the ball tonight with 16 points and 19 rebounds (8 in the first four minutes of the game!).

Dick Dud of the Night: Jeff Hornacek. Whatever decent offense existed in the first two games can be attributed to hustle. When the hustle went tonight, so did any semblance of an NBA team. More on this in the notes:

• Hornacek’s team looked lost tonight on both ends of the floor. There were no clear plays being run for either of the two main cogs in the offense in KP and Hardaway. Hardaway could benefit more coming off of screens for catch and shoot opportunities, rather than expecting him to create offense from nothing. The looks Porzingis was getting in the last few games, he was not getting tonight. Teams will always look to go at your star player, it’s on the coach to have the team find the best shots for him.
• I don’t know what is worse, looking at Aron Baynes’ haircut or having to listen to the pumped up TD Garden crowd noise.
• Early in the second quarter we were forced to endure a Jarrett Jack/Courtney Lee/Doug McDermott/Michael Beasley/Kyle O’Quinn lineup. I was eating, Jeff!
• Jayson Tatum had his way with the Knicks tonight, scoring from every area of the court. 45 points tonight between him and Jaylen Brown.
• Speaking of scoring from every area of the court, the Knicks didn’t. If it wasn’t a layup, the team could not hit a shot for their lives. 1 of 12 from downtown, compared to 14 of 29 for the Celtics.
• The Knicks also shot 42% from the field (which seems surprisingly high) and 64% from the charity stripe. Nothing was going in for the boys tonight.
• Guillermo Hernangomez got some garbage time burn from 3:00 left in the third quarter. 12 points and 2 steals on 5/6 shooting in 11 minutes. I give up. Let's call him by his full name and hope the coach mistakes him for a different player and gives him some legit burn.

That’s all for the recap, folks! I personally apologize for the performance tonight, and I hope neither you nor your family will have to experience anything like it again. Next game is on Friday at home against the Brooklyn Nets. Be there or just don’t!