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Which company should sponsor the Knicks’ jerseys?

Get me the phone number of the world’s largest fedora manufacturer!

NBA: Preseason-New York Knicks at Washington Wizards Amber Searls-USA TODAY Sports

The New York Knicks will announce their first-ever jersey sponsor Tuesday morning in an event they are hyping up considerably.

I imagine the Knicks will partner with the likes of Chase, some boring financial behemoth who sees the Knicks as nothing more than another iconic brand. But the Knicks are so much more—or maybe so much less—than their brand. Let’s brainstorm some companies that would best fit the ‘Bockers.

Bay Ridge Honda

Their commercials have long been a staple of Knicks broadcasts. When I think of the Knicks, I think of Bay Ridge Honda, and vice versa.

Eagles—"Their Greatest Hits (1971-1975)”

James Dolan’s favorite band is still lagging behind Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” in the race to be the top-selling record of all time. Perhaps it’s time for the Knicks to use their brand muscle to help push their lukewarm L.A. rock-and-roll over the top. Personally, I love this for the Dolan Knicks because nothing says “I don’t get New York and I never will” quite like listening to the Eagles.

Clyde’s Wine and Dine

Nothing hits the spot quite like Clyde Frazier promoting his restaurant during the dying moments of yet another Knicks blowout loss. Clyde didn’t invent branding, but he pretty much perfected it. The organization owes him for putting him through so many horrific basketball spectacles—this would be a nice consolation prize.

Creative Artists Agency (CAA)

They already pretty much own the organization, so why not make it official?

Cellino or Barnes

The “don’t wait, call 8” lawyers who wormed their way into the hearts of New Yorkers are splitting up. If Cellino and Barnes plan to go their separate ways, each one could really use some new solo branding. Imagine a “BARNES: ATTORNEY AT LAW” patch on the front of a Knicks jersey. It sure as hell beats paying Matt Barnes to wear his name on the back.


Donate your car today.

Kazoobies Kazoos LLC

This South Carolina-based company is perhaps our nation’s premium manufacturer of high-quality kazoos, built right here in America. If Dolan wants to try for another world kazoo record, a deal with Kazoobies Kazoos would be fiscally prudent.

What company do you think should partner with the Knicks? Let us know in the comments.