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Monday Siberian Tigers

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Melo and Iverson hanging out; Boogie and Brow hanging out; Oakley and Dolan NOT hanging out.

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By Appaloosa - Own work, CC BY-SA 3.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=8890887

Good morrow, Posters and/or Toasters! My name is Alex, and I’ll be your tour guide on what we call “links posts.” We’re bringing back Mamphisbirdiles! I am a classically untrained zoologist, so I will be teaching you about animals with my vast knowledge of Wikipedia. I’ll also of course be covering the most dangerous animal of all: Knicks. Let’s get to it:

  • Siberian tigers are probably my favorite animal in the whole wide world. At about 11 feet long and 660 lbs on average, they’re one of the most intimidating mammals that this planet has to offer. Most live in (you guessed it), Siberia, in the land of our future overlords. Despite their cuddly-yet-menacing appearance, like many furry mammals, the Siberian tiger will not actively try to hunt humans unless put under duress. These guys are unfortunately endangered, because humans suck. They also eat up to 60 lbs of food per sitting. (Ed. Note: They are also called Manchurian tigers, as my mother-in-law — a proud Manchu herself — would like to point out. — Joe)
  • Mike Lupica, high wizard of hot-takery, believes the Knicks should hire Patrick Ewing next season. Ewing actually seems qualified. But it would also be super Knicksy to bail on yet another coach after only a year or so on the job.
  • From Stefan Bondy, former Knick Tracy McGrady doesn't like Phil Jackson's treatment of Melo. So sayeth T-Mac: “Melo’s better than me because all that s--t that’s going on with Melo and Phil, and Phil has the arrogance to sit in the stands, at these games, and I’m playing great basketball — I’d be looking at him every trip down the court or something. Just gazing at him, like, ‘You see the s--t that I’m doing out here like every night? Nah.’ Some players can play through that, others can’t. Obviously Melo is showing his mental toughness because playing in the Garden is not an easy place to play. Especially for Melo there. And he’s been doing his thing lately.” So yeah, he went in a little bit.
  • Hey, speaking of things I really wish would go away: Charles Oakley met with Adam Silver again on Sunday over brunch to further discuss the crap that’s already been discussed.
  • Melo scored 10 points in 19 minutes in the All-Star game. He was also a -17. Quick, everyone argue about it! Melo also smiled a little, despite having to cancel his family vacation, when he got to see old buddy Allen Iverson at the game.

Around the League:

  • Oh speaking of the All-Star game, Anthony Davis slightly overshadowed Melo, scoring 52 points, breaking Wilt Chamberlain’s 55-year-old record of 42. Russell Westbrook also shot like 800 threes in a row in the third quarter, and there was arguably the least defense ever played in a basketball game as the West won, 192-182 over the East.
  • May as well just call this “Pelicans news” instead of “Around the league” today, because the Pelicans stole the shit out of Demarcus Cousins yesterday, acquiring him for Buddy Hield, the Pels’ 2017 first- and second-round picks, Tyreke Evans, and former Knicks hero Langston Galloway. The Kings are expected to cut Langston, so maybe a Knicks reunion could be in the cards?!

That’s all I’ve got for today. Now for a few “peaceful” days, since the Knicks don’t play until primetime on Thursday. Unfortunately, the days when the Knicks don’t play tend to breed more storylines than the days that they do, and the trade deadline is Thursday at noon. Buckle up!