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Jazz - a lot, Knicks - a little: Scenes from “I’m turning something else on.”

Watch the fourth quarter only if you hate yourself

NBA: New York Knicks at Utah Jazz Russ Isabella-USA TODAY Sports

The Knicks lost tonight.

I don’t know the final score. I’m writing this at the beginning of the 4th quarter. I’ll probably turn this off in about a minute.

Here’s the only highlight that really matters, a sick Frank Ntilikina dunk:

I challenge any one of you to find another highlight from tonight.

This game had a worse Rotten Tomatoes score than Holmes and Watson.

Freddy Krueger used to think he was ugly, but after watching this game, he wonders if maybe he’s not so bad after all.

Jigsaw from the Saw movies had someone’s head rigged to get snapped off by a bear trap, and the person needed a key to free themselves. The person could either cut out their eyeball to get the key, or watch the fourth quarter of this Knicks-Jazz game. They cut out their eyeball.

This game was basically the Nasty Patty. Just when you thought it couldn’t get worse, it got worse. And someone probably died due to this game, too:

JD and the Straight Shot’s latest single is better than this game was.

KnicksFanTV was smarter than me and started up right after halftime. Call in at 657-383-1509. Maybe just sit on the line in stunned silence.

Against all odds, MMiranda is gonna try to recap this mess later. More power to him.