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London Game Preview Knicks vs Wizards- 1/17/19

Well chuffed.

Oi. Blud, Fam. Ay, bruv, the Knicks (10-33) are bringing a right minging brand of basketball to the UK to face the Wizards (18-26). Washington has been trying to right their ship and make a push for the playoffs. The absence of John Wall has broadened the roles of their rotation players as well as put Bradley Beal front and center for the franchise. The team has largely responded well to the re-shuffle. Beal in particular has been a man possessed. Certainly they figure to dispatch the Knicks as soundly as possible, and then go eat some extra soft sheep’s cheese and fried black pudding in chocolate sauce with mushy peas.

New York, if you somehow haven’t heard, will be without their resident rebound rover, Enes Kanter. The Knick big feller did not travel with the team in an effort to avoid getting too close for comfort to Turkey’s ball squeezer of a President, Recep Tayyip Erdoğan. The 6’1” Erdoğan probably doesn’t want any smoke trying to contend with Kanter on the low block any damn way cus he’s a fucking knob! A wanker, bruv. Read this Enes Kanter-penned opinion piece from the Washington Post. A little timely Washington-New York synergy! Way to go, teams!

This will be the third meeting between these teams on the season. Just the one game and then back to the states.

Projected Starters

The Knicks of course will be missing Kanter. Thankfully the lack of front court depth could be bolstered by the potential return of rookie Mitchell Robinson! The one who got a frisky Morris twin tossed from a pre-season engagement. What a knob, bruv.

More of the good stuff from Chris Iseman, but this doesn’t bode very well for the best French Knick of all time:

Last time Frank Ntilikina had a bit of a crowd, David Fizdale benched him on Christmas. Happy homecoming, Frankie Teardrop.

Washington is without John Wall for the rest of the season and will also be missing Markieff Morris, who assuredly would lose his cool if Mitchell Robinson sent his goofy ass packing on some lazy lay up. They’ll also be sourly missing the fart maniac, Dwight Howard.

Key Matchup

I’d be gobsmacked if the London fans don’t go potty for a bloke named “Bradley Beal”. He sounds like a regular Joe England. The kid’s got chops for certain. Check this poise as he wheels past and around one of the best defenders in the game for an easy scoop:

Beal has been rolling, averaging 29.3 points per game over his last ten. His last game before crossing the Atlantic was a 45-point triple double with 15 assists and ten rebounds. Granted it was a double overtime doozy. It’s still a heck of a line from Joe UK and reminiscent of the 28-8-8 he dumped on the Knicks’ heads in their last meeting. Have a look, blud.


The Wizards are going to mop the floor with the Knicks. Emmanuel Mudiay’s usual size advantage is completely negated by the slippery Tomas Satoransky. Beal will shred Tim Hardaway Jr. Former Knick, former Wizard, current Wizard, Trevor Ariza will prove troublesome for Kevin Knox, but may also represent an interesting level-up challenge for the neophyte. Of course David Fizdale will probably give Knox plenty of run against Otto Porter in the second unit too. I’m sure New York took a red eye to save a couple bucks. So, jet lag and tired legs.

Knicks by -23

Warm Up Music

Figured you might need a little home cooking. New York is holding it down for you, Knicks! RIP, P.

Only 19 but his game is older. Bloody chuffed. Well brilliant innit, bruv?