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Game Preview: Knicks vs. Nets, 11/24/2019

Don’t splash the Uber pool.

Have your dogs been skunked? Curious how to get that terrible stench off your dog’s body? Try applying a different skunk’s spray across the dog’s muzzle, chest, ears, back, stomach, legs and tail.

Oh well that’s an interesting lack of focus to start the game. Now, if you have enough skunk juice left over, you can pour it over the top of your dog’s food and rub it on the inside of their jowls and across their gums. Dogs just love stinky smells!

Heck of a job helping on someone who was bottled up with nowhere to go. Even better job not rotating to help the guys who helped you. So anyway, the Knicks (4-12) look to drive their shoulder into the stink of the night and roll over onto the Nets (7-8). New York is now only two games back from a team that is about two games back from the 8th seed. Looking good, guys!


Projected Starters

No Kyrie Irving for Brooklyn, he claims to have hurt his shoulder. The truth of course is that he is ducking Frank Ntilikina because he’s a total coward. Kyrie will be missing the next few games because he is also deathly afraid of the grievances the Boston crowd would like to file with him personally on Wednesday. It’s always some kind of funky injury thing with this guy.

In a similar vein, Caris LeVert always seems to be an awkward step away from catastrophe too. The 25 year old is just now starting to rehab from thumb surgery on his right (shooting) hand. And of course Kevin Durant does not intend to play this year because he is basically Kristaps Porzingis with a crossover.

For the Knicks, Mitchell Robinson came up a little gimpy last night, clearly still suffering from his ankle sprain. I’m sure David Fizdale thinks that Mitchell’s youth in conjunction with having two long legs means that there is no reason to monitor his usage.

Key Matchups & Predictions

This is the type of game that a bunch of blockheads put too much weight on. Which is exactly the type of game Julius Randle will pour his profound stench all over. So we can expect a career night from Taurean Prince, who will be allowed to camp out on the perimeter and fire up triples.

One of the aforementioned blockheads is Spencer Dinwiddie, who loves to stoke the flames of the perceived rivalry between Brooklyn and New York. Spencer is from Los Angeles, he just loves a juicy story. Big 90210 energy. Spencer is the Donna Martin of this shit. Dinwiddie will get a ton of control tonight. I wonder if the Knicks have anyone equipped to make him uncomfortable. Oh look! A video of Frank Ntilkina playing defense all by himself.

New York is hard pressed for a victory, losers of seven out of their last ten. Brooklyn meanwhile is looking to tack on a third straight win. With the Nets playing again tomorrow night, I wouldn’t be shocked to see them try to land a haymaker in the first quarter to see if they can get the Knicks to crumble under the pressure of an increasingly ornery crowd. Then give their already depleted roster a little bit of rest in preparation for the Cavs tomorrow.

The Nets will seek and destroy the Knicks poor front line, running several screens at Frank Ntilikina to pull Randle and Bobby Portis into open water and then screech past them for layups or kick out to open shooters as the Knicks help defenders collapse.

Knicks by -7.

Warm Up Music

This song is about Kyrie Irving.