Newspapers, big brothers, and anything else that can possibly link Giannis Antetokounmpo to the Knicks.

New York is a great town and everyone loves it. Unless you’re a Sasquatch and don’t want to leave your home in the woods. That’s why it’s been confirmed that there are rumors of Giannis Antetokounmpo coming to the Garden, the Mecca. It’s a miracle just below 34th street and three blocks west of Madison Square Park where the dog piss smells like that first hit of albuterol. What pandemic, you tell yourself, as you treat your somewhat normal breathing issue before cold season briskly flows into the streets. Achoo! Hey are you done with that paper, pal?

He is reading The New York Times, that means it’s time to come to New York! It looks like it’s set in stone tablets. Giannis’ brother Thanasis Antetokounmpo played for the Knicks several front office generations ago. He was a wild man and we loved him. He was like a wild style Jerami Grant. I remember it well.

Yea so, trading for Giannis will be like that, except against NBA caliber competition. Can you imagine!? Playoffs here we come! Our savior who says his agents will work out this future in the best way possible. And what better way than to be able to make the most money in endorsements by being in New York? You stay in the leastern conference and just set up some bogus residence in Turks and Caicos where your Nike checks can go. There’s nothing to lose.

Eric Bledsoe needs to take a cue from Marvin Williams and retire! But he won’t. Therefore Giannis deciding that he will accept a trade of his talents to New York and only New York is such a delightful revelation. We’re all so happy about this concrete news that needs to be reported on by more media outlets. You don’t think it was a deep fake, do you?

Anyway, paging Leon Rose! Get it done, Leon!